But a long-time, local observer says these concerned citizens came to the table far too late. That pundit believes that the voters were far too complacent in 2010, believing that virtually anyone could run a City like Villa Hills. After all, everything had been going well for many years. How hard could it be? Besides, change is good, right? Why not give the little fellow that the good old boys had been picking on-or so the little fellow said-a chance to show what he could really do if given the chance?
This long-time, local observer puts it this way:
In 2010, the voters were like the naïve man who let his mouth-breathing, hillbilly neighbor borrow his mint-condition, well-maintained, vintage car. Why? Because the hillbilly neighbor spun a false tale that his wife was in labor and-on the way to the delivery room-he needed to drop off a donation for the starving children of the Duchy of Grand Fenwick, keep his appointment with his brain surgeon to have the metal plate in his head adjusted and put out the raging fire at his aged aunt's house.
Oh, the naïve man should have seen the warning signs. The naïve man should have remembered that the mouth-breathing hillbilly neighbor told him earlier that he and his supposedly in-labor wife were "gonna go to that thar square dancin' thang" that very same night. The naïve man should have realized that the Duchy of Grand Fenwick was the tiny, fictional country from The Mouse That Roared. It should have occurred to the naïve man that his mouth-breathing, hillbilly neighbor had no brain, and therefore had no use for a brain surgeon. Finally, it should have dawned on the naïve man that he knew the mouth-breathing, hillbilly neighbor's aunt was deceased when the bank refused to cash a check given to him by his mouth-breathing hillbilly neighbor that had been signed by that supposedly aged aunt. Why did the bank refuse to cash the check? Because the bank told the naïve man that the aunt had passed away years before.
But, the naïve man suspended disbelief and handed the keys to his mint-condition, well-maintained, vintage car to his mouth-breathing, hillbilly neighbor. What happened next should have been predictable, but evidently wasn't.
You see, the mouth-breathing, hillbilly neighbor returned the car in an incredible state of disrepair to the naïve man two hours later. The sound system had been removed. There were terrible dents on every quarter-panel. The car's brand new tires were nearly bald, as if someone had used the car to drag-race. The front windshield was shattered. There was no gas left in the tank. The roadside emergency kit, spare tire and jack in the trunk were missing.
But this isn't the end of the story. The mouth-breathing, hillbilly neighbor told another incredible tale of being attacked by a gang of hooligans while running his many important errands. These hooligans were actually to blame for the incredible damage to the naïve man's cherished automobile.
The mouth-breathing hillbilly then asked the naïve man if he could borrow the vintage vehicle for two more hours. And, oh, by the way, could the naïve man also give the mouth-breathing hillbilly neighbor $23,000 to pay the medical bills for his wife and newborn baby? And, oh, yes, he could sure use another thirty bucks to fill up the gas tank.
The naïve man should have known better. But, what would the rest of the neighborhood think if this naïve man refused to help these allegedly pitiful people? Why, they might look down on the naïve man. He just couldn't bare the thought of the shame and embarrassment. So, he handed the keys back to his hillbilly neighbor along with a check for $23,000 to pay the medical bills. And, he reached in to his pocket and handed his hillbilly neighbor and extra twenty and ten.
Two hours later, the mouth-breathing, hillbilly neighbor returned yet again. This time the naïve man's car looked as if it had been damaged beyond repair. The naïve man was convinced his insurance company's claims adjuster would declare his vintage vehicle a total loss. Despite it all, the mouth-breathing, hillbilly neighbor offered up even more incredible excuses and asked the naïve man if he could borrow the car "for another four hours" to finish all the important work he had to do. What should the naïve man do?
And what should the voters of Villa Hills do in 243 days?
