Thursday, July 31, 2014

Wischer Files For Re-Election

The Martin Chronicles has kept in close contact with its Kenton County Courthouse sources. Why? To keep up-to-date on the mayor and council candidate filings to stand for election this November in current malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's embarrassed burg of Villa Hills.

We have already told you that long-time Villa Hills resident Ernie Brown and former Covington Mayor Irvin Callery have filed to challenge the mallet-headed Martin for the keys to the mayor's office. To date, Martin has not returned calls from the media who are inquiring whether or not the little liar plans to stand for re-election. Don't worry. Our deep-cover sources continue to tell us that Martin-with assistance from some of the leadership of the asshats at the civic club-has every intention to sling a mountain of mud in his attempt to earn another undeserved four years in power.

We have already learned that the first council candidate has now filed his papers. Who is it? None other than current Councilman Brian R. Wischer. Wischer has had an outstanding first term on Villa Hills City Council. His top achievements include, uh . . . well. . . er . . . ahh . . . umm . . . okay, we need to give that some thought.

Hey, wait a minute, Wischer has served as the chairperson of the Villa Hills Administration Committee. You know, the Administration Committee that has done, uh . . . well . . . we . .. ahh . . . umm . . . okay, we need to give that some thought too.

We admit it. We don't know much about Brian R. Wischer. But what we do know troubles us. Despite his media quote that he "likes the idea of knowing each Villa Hills Police Officer by name", he has been an ardent supporter and guaranteed "yes" vote for the malevolent Martin in the tiny tyrant's well-documented vendetta against the police.

We also know that Wischer had a close relative-you know, like perhaps a sister who works as a paralegal-assist Martin in constructing an infamous Municipal Order. You remember, don't you? The Municipal Order Martin signed in January, 2013. The one Martin signed after the voters gave him his mostly-supplicant "golden moment" council? The one that gave Martin the power to even bring in the FBI to harass the local police department's leadership. Yeah, that one. We knew you'd remember.  

We also decided to "Google" Wischer to put some meat on the bare bones of his biography. So what did we find? Well, we found that somebody named Brian R. Wischer was arrested in Kenton County on eleven counts-of mostly drug-related crimes-in 1997.

Well, don't that beat all? We don't know if the Brian R. Wischer arrested in Kenton Count on eleven counts-of mostly drug-related crimes-in 1997 is the same Brian R. Wischer who is running for re-election to Villa Hills City Council. You know Villa Hills. That little town that happens to be in, uh . . . well . . . er . . . ahh . . . um . . . okay, KENTON COUNTY.

But what if it is the same Brian R. Wischer? Let us tell you why that presents a major revelation about the hypocrisy of the current, malfeasant Villa Hills Mayor Mike Martin.

You see, we have already reported that Martin is compiling a calumnious case against upcoming opponents Ernie Brown and Irvin Callery. The miniature mullah plans to falsely claim that falsely-alleged past personal indiscretions disqualify Brown and Callery from taking his undeserved place.

But what about the mysterious Brian R. Wischer who was arrested in Kenton County? If the same Brian R.Wischer arrested on-mostly-drug-related-charges-is the same Brian R. Wischer who is a full supporter of the miscreant Martin's mindless agenda, is he somehow exempt from the mendacious Martin's upcoming mountain of mindless mud?

Is it simply because Martin knows that Brian R. Wischer is a guaranteed "yes" vote for the mismanaging mayor's mindless agenda?

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Time Flies Even When You're NOT Having Fun

The Martin Chronicles has a large election countdown clock in the foyer of its palatial offices. Today marks 96 days-and counting. Time is beginning to race by.

The next significant signpost is Tuesday, August 12. Why? Because all of the candidates for mayor and city council in Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's embattled burg will have filed their election paperwork. We certainly look for some big surprises.

We are absolutely certain that no matter how many new council members are elected on November 4, Villa Hills' lousy lot will not improve if Martin lies his way to re-election. The diminutive dictator has already clearly demonstrated that his oddly-oversized ego prevents him from effectively working with anyone. Two different sets of councilmembers over the past four years-and nothing but failure and turmoil.

We are already tracking down several of those aforementioned "big surprises" as the August 12 filing deadline quickly approaches.

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Legal Fees About To Spike Yet Again

The Martin Chronicles has been talking with several well-placed sources who tell us that legal fees in Villa Hills will soon be on the rise again. To a person, these sources tell us that Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's June council meeting assertion that "legal fees will be coming down" was-to be nice-grossly inaccurate. As one source put it so well, "What Martin said was either complete deception or complete delusion".

If Martin is trying to deceive the public, it is another example of where the tiny tyrant tells a lie simply to survive the moment. "The moment"-in this particular case-is his re-election bid that will be decided in a mere 97 days. If the diminutive dictator can hold his finger in the dyke holding back a torrent of legal fees until then, he can simply shrug his stooped shoulders and say, "I didn't know that then. But I know that now". Then the miniature mullah will proceed to blame everybody but himself for the explosion of waste on legal fees. He-he-he-he-he.

It doesn't take a highly-skilled cartographer to understand the legal "lay of the land" in Martinville. Let's take a simple inventory. There are still several unresolved-and serious-lawsuits outstanding from the mindless Martin's vendetta against the Villa Hills Police Department. Despite Martin's failed efforts to have the taxpayers pick up the full tab for his personal liability, these lawsuits continue. Oh, and the legal meter on these unresolved lawsuits continues to run and run and run and run and run and run and run.

Despite the continual lies Martin is telling his feeble friends at the civic club, the taxpayer money the pint-sized PerĂ³n has spent on lawyers and legal fees is speeding towards seven figures with no end in sight. The sane members of Villa Hills' voting public should be sounding every alarm bell they can about this abject waste of taxpayer money.

How about a little historical perspective? Martin's first-and hopefully only-mayoral term will end in the fifty-second year of Villa Hills' history. At that point, Martin will have spent more money on lawyers and legal actions in his four years in office than all of the previous administrations spent over the previous forty-eight years combined.

All of this taxpayer money has been squandered simply because Martin was hell-bent on exacting revenge for his judicially-justified 2007 FORGERY ARREST. That is a complete disgrace.

The mallet-headed Martin's so-called "tight ship" is sinking in a sea of red ink.

Monday, July 28, 2014

Does He REALLY Believe It Himself?

The Martin Chronicles beloved publisher hosted a "working" luncheon for our entire staff on Saturday. Even our third shift staff and reporters came to the gathering. And why not? Who passes up the chance for prime rib, sirloin steak, rib-eye, T-bone, filet mignon, crab, shrimp, scallops, clams, lobster and an open bar just to sleep?

The "working" part of the grand buffet? To discuss whether or not Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin REALLY believes all of the lies he has told over the past almost-four dreadful years.

Here is how our beloved publisher ran the "working" lunch. Armed with a stack of 4x5 flash cards, our beloved publisher read one Martin lie at a time and then opened the floor for discussion.

Here is just a small sampling of the topics discussed over the seven-plus hours of surf & turf feast:
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that all those people he promised in 2010 he would repeal the UNFAIR $40 PER CAR STICKER TAX would forget that broken promise when they went to the polls in 2014?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that he didn't commit FORGERY when four respected appellate judges with decades of legal experience clearly opined that what Martin was doing for many years "fit the very definition of FORGERY?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY-happily-believe that he wasn't suing the taxpayers of Villa Hills for the hefty sum of $1.505 MILLION when no less a distinguished judicial body than the US Supreme Court opined that Martin was doing exactly that?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that it is was acceptable to hire an unqualified, incompetent crony to oversee the City's finances, preventing City Council from performing their mandated duty of fiscal oversight?
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that it was okay to use taxpayer money to hire multiple computer companies to hack in to the police department computers looking for some phony way to prove that department leadership really was trying to frame him for FORGERY?"
  • Does Martin REALLY believe that it was okay to misuse taxpayer-funded City personnel and resources for POLITICAL PURPOSES, despite the fact that he received a reprimand from the Villa Hills Ethics Board for doing so?"
  • Does Martin REALLY believe it was acceptable to sit idly by when a female employee was being harassed by a former City Councilman-despite the risk it created for the City's taxpayers-and say nothing when his own wife gleefully participated in the harassers failed State Senate campaign?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that the non-existent NKAPC President Paul de Paul really exists?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that it was somebody else's fault when hundreds of City documents pertaining to a serious, ongoing lawsuit were ILLEGALLY BURNED when he ordered the Public Works Director to burn those very documents-and ordered the Public Works Director to say nothing about the ILLEGAL BURNING?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that it doesn't matter that he was CONVICTED ON SEVEN OF NINE COUNTS OF OFFICIAL MISCONDUCT AND NEGLECT OF DUTY by a duly-enacted, legal, governing body?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that all he needed was a "new City Council" to trample over in 2013 and beyond when what has happened after a majority of voters bought in to his FALSE PREMISE in the 2012 election has proven to be a cruel hoax?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that it passes conflict-of-interest muster to hire his own personal attorney to serve as the TAXPAYER-FUNDED CITY ATTORNEY?"
  • Does Martin REALLY believe that it is perfectly fine to sign a City purchase order that put more than TWENTY-THREE THOUSAND TAXPAYER DOLLARS IN TO HIS OWN POCKET?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that it way okay to publicly trash the former-Assistant Police Chief for justifiably earning money resulting from a LEGAL CONTRACT Martin himself spent TAXPAYER MONEY to draft and then signed himself was correct?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that no one would remember that he LIED when he told television cameras that former Villa Hills Police Chief Dan Goodenough was "taking a few days off" when the reality was that Martin himself was hatching a pernicious plot to publicly embarrass the former Chief in to an unfair and premature retirement?"
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that anyone believed his bull$#!+ that 48 of 52 City budgets were nothing more that "bottom line" budgets", despite the fact that none of the previous Villa Hills City budgets were "bottom line" budgets that enabled a mayor to spend TAXPAYER MONEY any way he saw fit.
  • Does Martin REALLY believe that its no big deal that his City Administrator/City Clerk Craigory T. Bohman is interviewing with both Ludlow and Ft. Mitchell for another job?
  • "Does Martin REALLY believe that The Dark Knight known as The Martin Chronicles would ever go away as long as that little liar sits in the mayor's office?"
The general belief that was that Martin didn't care one way or the other whether the bull$#!+ he was spouting at the time was true. All the little fella from Norwood cared about was surviving that moment.

98 more days of "moments" until election day.

Sunday, July 27, 2014

WEEKENDER II: Free Speech is EXACTLY That.

The Martin Chronicles has written about this topic before. We're going to write about this topic again. Why? Because it is extremely important.

The topic is the US Constitutionally-guaranteed First Amendment right of free speech. That guaranteed right is under shameless attack by supporters of Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin. Their incessant attacks on that guaranteed right is both vile and disgusting.

Again, we don't mind a bit when these pinheads criticize us. In fact, it energizes us to work even harder uncovering the incompetence and corruption of Martin and his minions. We sure hope these mindless morons keep it up through November 4.

But reasonable people should find it intolerable when nasty nitwits say or post that critics of the misdirecting Martin are simply people who lost an election. Aside from the absolute fact that the calumnious claim is completely untrue (and we are living proof of that), it is also a hypocritical and heinous assault on the Free Speech rights of those who did lose an election.

Why "hypocritical", you ask? Just look at what the mendacious Martin himself did. Mostly because Martin's judicially-justified 2007 FORGERY ARREST was fresh in the minds of voters, he was defeated in his bid for re-election to City Council in November, 2008.

What did the malevolent Martin do next? The little liar spent most of the next two years constructing a fantastic fairy tale that he was some kind of "good government zealot" who was "set up" by dark forces (we will call those non-existent dark forces "the good old boys") hell-bent on derailing his efforts. This despite the proven fact that Martin absolutely did COMMIT FORGERY when he signed his deceased mother's name on checks incorrectly mailed to his deceased mother, cashed them and pocketed the proceeds for years.

Smarting from the embarrassment of the very real (and widespread) scandal of hundreds of thousands of dollars embezzled from the Villa Hills Civic Club, the ass clowns who regularly waste their evenings at the civic club bar lapped up Martin's lies and spread those lies at every opportunity. Back then, those inebriated ne'er-do-wells actually had some level of credibility. Go figure.

But the miscreant Martin didn't stop there. Martin routinely pimped the high-strung, former City Councilmember Mike Pope (January, 2009-December, 2012) with tall tales of government waste, fraud and abuse. Why? Because the pernicious punk knew full well that Pope is an easy touch with his own axes to grind. So, Pope would come to council meetings intent on spreading Martin's mendacity. Pope's "alternative reality" City website was also full of Martin's lies.

As they say in the infomercials, "But wait, there's more". Martin recruited drones who went by pseudonyms like "meto3130", "skittle" and "kentoncounty1" to sit in their dimly-lit basements in their stained underwear with drool running down their cheeks to post all manner of defamation and deceit on dinosaur sites like While the efforts were decidedly low-brow-just as Martin himself is-they did have some impact on the inattentive voters of Villa Hills.

So-after his deceitful campaign-Martin was indeed narrowly elected mayor in 2010. What has happened since has brought incredible embarrassment on Villa Hills and its City Government.

Besides, when former elected officials criticize the mallet-headed Martin, they are absolutely right. They had the incredible misfortune to attempt to work with the miniature mullah, after all.

Oh, there is also the fact that they have every guaranteed right to speak out. Despite what Sheila, Wanda, David, Judy Grisly, Les, Adam and other fascists say. These people-and a sizable segment of others-are precisely why Villa Hills City Government is currently in expensive turmoil.

Even still, we hope they keep yapping.


Friday, July 25, 2014

WEEKENDER: Tick, Tick, Tick, Tick, Tick Redux

The Martin Chronicles is amazed by the rapid passage of time. By the time Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's dreadful "Reign of Error" ends its first-and hopefully only-orbit around the inner circle of Dante's Inferno, the diminutive dictator will have spent 1,461 days severely screwing up Villa Hills once well-running City Government.

Lies. Corruption. Incompetence. Mismanagement. Malfeasance. Misconduct. Neglect. Wastefulness. Lies. Fraud. Abuse. Stupidity. Avarice.Humiliation. Defamation. Intimidation. Lies. Cronyism. Embarrassment. Harassment. Chaos. Tumult, Murkiness, Uncertainty. Lies. Deceit. Lawlessness. Abnormality. Shame. Conflict. Manipulation. Exploitation. Lies. Bungling. Uncertainty. Doubt. Absurdity. Greed. Distortion. Coercion. Lies. It would be wholly unfair to say that any one of these words describe Martin's administration over the past nearly-four, dreadful years. Why? Because absolutely all of them do. It has been a total disgrace.

That is why we see Sunday, July 27 as a banner day. So, why? Because that is Day 99 in the countdown to when the malevolent and mismanaging Martin must face the voters again. The voters will have the opportunity to correct the embarrassing mistake they made in November, 2010.

TIme is running out.

Thursday, July 24, 2014

One-Trick Pony?

The Martin Chronicles is perfectly content with its role as Villa Hills' "Dark Knight". We'd rather have Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's supporters taking cheap shots at us. That diverts the Martin supporters away from taking their usual cheap shots at those who are running against the tiny tyrant to restore some sense of sanity in Villa Hills City government.

Interestingly, when we're accused of "bashing", it is actually the accusers who are "playing politics". Let's face it. Politics at all levels is-by its very nature-partisan. The term "bashing" is frequently used to cast negative aspersions on critics for-you guessed it-"political" gain. It's enough to make your head spin, isn't it?

We fully admit that we are very critical of the misdirecting Martin. We have a natural dislike for government corruption and incompetence-the cornerstones of Martin's nearly-four dreadful years in the mayor's office. Any fair-minded person must admit that there has been far too much waste, far too much turmoil and far too much embarrassment. Almost all of it has been unnecessary. In fact, a great deal of it has been intentionally manufactured by the mendacious Martin and his cronies.

One might think that local politics-especially in a small town like Villa Hills-would be exempt from the ugliness of politics at the state and national level. That's not the case in Villa Hills, however. That could be why some folks derisively refer to the town as "Vitriol Hills".

The origins of the ugliness date back before Martin. The innuendoes, whispering campaigns and below-the-belt cheap shot-style politics actually began-and were authored by-Mary Koenig during her first go-around on City Council in the 1990's. The mean-spirited Martin-and others-have simply strongly embraced Koenig's philosophy and perfected it to "high-or better put, low-art".  

In a twisted way, it makes sense for Martin to conduct himself in such a nasty manner. Why? Because he actually can't tell the truth. Because the truth in Martin's case is not good.

So, why shouldn't the mallet-headed Martin try to divert attention away from his own dishonesty, shortcomings and abject failures by slinging mud at other people? It worked for him in 2010 and 2012. Besides...

It's all Martin's got.