WEEKENDER: Recycled Humor

The Martin Chronicles knows that old jokes never die, they just get recycled in to topical humor. Our beloved publisher was dining at a local restaurant recently near malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's strife-torn Villa Hills the other day. He overheard several patrons laughing hysterically at a fellow telling jokes. Following are a couple of snippets from the comedian's routine.

"So Mike Martin walks into the civic club with a toad sitting on his head. One of the curious ass clowns sitting at the bar asks, 'What's up with that?' To everyone's surprise, the toad responds, 'I'd have this nasty boil removed from my butt, but it would cost me a fortune!'"

The comedian continued.

 

"Have you heard the one about the man who died and was standing before the pearly gates talking with Saint Peter? The man asked about the incredible number of clocks displayed around the gates. Saint Peter explained that each clock told how many times someone lied by the ticks of the second hand. Saint Peter first showed the man his clock. 'See, your clock has only ticked off eight seconds. So, you only told eight lies in your entire life. That is very good. You should be proud. See this clock with the cob webs on it. That clock belongs to Mother Teresa. She never told a lie.'"

"Becoming curious, the man asked Saint Peter where Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's clock was. Saint Peter replied, 'Well, Moses' office used to get a little warm until he started using Mike Martin's clock for a fan!'"

After she stopped laughing, long-time Villa Hills resident Henrietta Youngman threw up her hands and said, "Take our malfeasant mayor . . . PLEASE!!!!

That brought down the whole house.