Inside sources tell us that the immediate, incredible show of support for Mr. Brown's candidacy has sent shockwaves to the brainless-trust of the "Re-Elect Mayor Martin 2014" campaign. As we would expect, the hillbilly lynchmob has already begun to respond by ramping up the mallet-headed Martin's own campaign Facebook page.
Following are just a few of posts Martin's campaign inoperatives put up today:
Mayor Mike Martin
6 hrs
We're in the money! Janet and I sure enjoyed the Florida trip we took after I signed the purchase order to pay myself more than TWENTY-THREE THOUSAND TAXPAYER-FUNDED DOLLARS. We both got sunburnt though. Spending everyone else's money has been great! Thanks!!!
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Mayor Mike Martin
5 hrs
People let me tell ya 'bout my best friend! I wanted to share a photo of me and my personal and City Attorney Toad V. McMurtry during one of the worst moments of my mayor-ness time thingy. Sure, I know legal fees are approaching A HALF A MILLION DOLLARS since Toad joined us. But he's a fine legal mind. Without him, I might have been CONVICTED ON MORE THAN SEVEN OF NINE COUNTS OF OFFICIAL MISCONDUCT AND NEGLECT OF DUTY.
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Mayor Mike Martin
4 hrs
My "golden moment" council has been a terrible disappointment. Why won't anyone ever work with me? Janet and Cordelia will be holding signs in front of River Ridge on November 4th holding signs that say "Villa Hills Needs Yet Another New Council". Even that dumbass Holly has tried to get in my way. But I have a big surprise for that stupid fool!
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3 hrs
Being the mayor is hard work! Can you believe that there are some mean people out there who actually think I should have sat down with (railroaded former Police Chief) Dan Goodenough first before I spent nearly TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND TAXPAYER DOLLARS trying to publicly humiliate him? Hey, I'm awful busy running my unlicensed, shoddy-at-best handyman business. And the taxpayers are only paying me a crummy $200 a month. I know the voters will understand.
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2 hrs
Can you believe that there are actually people who think I'm STUPID? Hey, I are creative problem solver. Want a example? Well, why spend $50 to pay a locksmith to open a $1,200 safe when you can make the public works fellas crush it open with a backhoe. So who's stupid now? He-he-he-he-he.
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Mayor Mike Martin
1 hr
What the hell is wrong with the voters of Villa Hills anyway? I thought they had finally come around to the idea of supporting lying pieces of crap. So why did they ignore my endorsement of Steve Arlinghaus and throw him out on his ass? That's okay. I already got what I wanted from him anyway. Now I can lie my way to another four years as mayor of Villa Hills.
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