Did Toad Land Another Gig?

The Martin Chronicles is following up on an anonymous tip. Namely that Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's high-priced whore Toad McMurtry has taken on yet another mayoral client. Who could it be this time? Our tipster reminded us that the mayor of Walton has been in the news recently. Hmmmm.

Of course you know what tactics Toad will employ if he is hired. It worked for Martin. So why wouldn't Toad's antics work in Walton? Here's how it would go:

• The Walton mayor is the target of a witch hunt
• The previous Walton mayor didn't leave the current Walton mayor a paper clip or Post-It Note
• The Walton council refuses to work with the Walton mayor
• The Walton council is made up of a bunch of bullies
• The Walton council just wants to blame the Walton mayor for breaking the law
• 75% of Walton's residents support the Walton mayor and don't care what laws the Walton mayor may have broken
• The Walton Police Chief is a liar
• The Walton Police Chief failed to tell the Walton mayor that the Walton mayor wasn't allowed to break the law
• The Walton Detective is a baboon
• The Walton Detective planted evidence to incriminate the Walton mayor
• Walton council members then tampered with that planted evidence
• The Walton City Clerk is an incompetent boob
• The Walton Assistant City Clerk has it out for the Walton mayor
• The temporary Walton City employee messed everything up
• The Walton mayor left church early to unclog the Walton mayor's neighbor's toilet
• The Walton mayor does charity work in some godforsaken Third World country

And of course, The Number One Reason that the Walton Mayor should be set free:

• The Walton Mayor didn't know then. But the Walton Mayor knows now.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!