Okay, here are the Cliff’s Notes:
A gentleman professing to be a good friend of Mike Martin came to the podium during the “public comment” portion of the meeting. The gentleman very politely asked Martin to resign. The reason? Because “things are not going well.” STOP THE PRESSES!!!!
After nearly eight years of Martin LIES, SLANDER, DEFAMATION, FIT-THROWING, CHARACTER ASSASSINATION, HAND-WRINGING, BED-WETTING, CALUMNY, WHINING, MOANING, CRYING and CATERWALLING about the man who provided building inspection services to the City of Villa Hills these past many years, the mayor shrugged his shoulders and signed this man he despises so much to a two-year, guaranteed contract to provide-wait for it-hang on-here it comes-BUILDING INSPECTON SERVICES. Oh, no. You aren’t getting off that easy. It gets even better. MARTIN GAVE THIS GUY A RAISE!!!!!
The Martin Chronicles doesn't even want to try to get into the mind of Martin. We wouldn't fit. It is far too small. But it is clear that Martin now warmly embraces the concept of DOUBLE DIPPING!
The Martin Chronicles doesn't even want to try to get into the mind of Martin. We wouldn't fit. It is far too small. But it is clear that Martin now warmly embraces the concept of DOUBLE DIPPING!
Our sources told us that Martin had been throwing out chest-beating hints that he had a real “bombshell” to reveal at last night’s redneck romp. The Martin Chroncles was intrigued. We were at the edge of our metaphorical seat. What a let down. It reminded our publisher of the time he was invited to a fireworks display at Grandma's house. Expecting a huge, pyrotechnic show, the litle boy was subjected to an hour of his alcoholic uncle waving a sparkler around in a driving hailstorm!
So, exactly what was that “bombshell”? Well, as it turns out, one of the council people doesn’t have an occupational license. In Martin’s desperate mind that somehow vindicates him of all of the high crimes and misdemeanors the little mayor has committed. Do you know why that councilman doesn’t have an occupational license? Brace yourself-it is shocking-hold on-yep, here it comes-oh, that’s right, HE DOESN’T NEED ONE!!!! Martin should know that there are 8,000 people in his “naked city”. Very few of them have occupational licenses. That absolves the mayor of nothing.
So, exactly what was that “bombshell”? Well, as it turns out, one of the council people doesn’t have an occupational license. In Martin’s desperate mind that somehow vindicates him of all of the high crimes and misdemeanors the little mayor has committed. Do you know why that councilman doesn’t have an occupational license? Brace yourself-it is shocking-hold on-yep, here it comes-oh, that’s right, HE DOESN’T NEED ONE!!!! Martin should know that there are 8,000 people in his “naked city”. Very few of them have occupational licenses. That absolves the mayor of nothing.
We would also be remiss if we didn’t report that Greg Kilburn’s audition for the role of Neville Chamberlain in the upcoming Mike Martin’s Electrical Follies production of Springtime For Hitler went exceptionally well.
To close our report for now, it appears that Special Counsel will make his initial report to the public on Monday, April 30. About fifteen minutes-okay, we had better give Martin thirty minutes to catch the clue train-alright, an hour-after the report begins Martin will come to realize that his mounting problems have little or nothing to do with the fact that he avoided getting an occupational license. You should be there. We certainly will be.
