Friday, February 21, 2014

WEEKENDER: We'll Know "The Field" In Less Than 173 Days

The Martin Chronicles is really, really, really looking forward to providing our vast audience with full, in-depth coverage of ELECTION 2014 in malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's Villa Hills. It will prove to be the stuff that reporters live to cover.

Deep cover sources are telling us that Martin is already in full re-election mode. These sources report that Martin is desperately scrambling to convince his compliant City Council to agree to certain steps designed to create a phony façade of fitness masking the stench of abject failure that hangs over his dreadful and corrupt misadministration.

Oh, there are certain to be a lot of shocking and odd twists and turns in the days immediately ahead. We will be reporting on Martin's frantic attempts to paper over the fact that he has intentionally driven the local police department to the brink of extinction in brutish pursuit of his vendetta caused by his 2007 FORGERY ARREST.

The local department has lost three of its long-serving, dedicated officers recently as a result of Martin's vendetta. Sources in other City's tell us that other Villa Hills police officers are interviewing for a new job as well. Given the dreadful conditions Martin has created, who can blame them?

We also know for a fact that Martin will be playing a con man's shell game with a variety of proposed tax increases. Martin's sinister strategy? Our insiders tell us that the diminutive dictator will make sure that his compliant City Council loudly signs on to a number of proposed tax increases-like MARTIN'S UNFAIR ENERGY TAX, and MARTIN'S SNEAKY INCREASE of the current Insurance Premium tax, and Martin's proposed HUGE INCREASE IN PROPERTY TAXES TO FUND A NON-EXISTANT ROAD PLAN and Martin's broken-promise-continuation of the UNFAIR $40 PER CAR STICKER TAX that he strongly supported. Then, when he rams only one of these taxes down the taxpayers' throats, he will falsely claim that he saved them money.

Multiple sources have also told us that it is a fact that Martin is frantically rushing to create the illusion that he actually has a real street repair program. Don't be surprised if Martin squanders large sums of taxpayer money blacktopping over a number of streets this year in hopes that the voters forget that he has done NOTHING for the previous three years.

Other insiders have tipped us off to the fact that Martin is using taxpayer money to consult his personal goon squad on a sinister strategy to whitewash his CONVICTION ON SEVEN OF NINE COUNTS OF OFFICIAL MISCONDUCT AND NEGLECT OF DUTY, HIS LAMBASTING BY A RESPECTED JUDGE FOR HIS ILLEGAL DESTRUCTION OF CITY RECORDS, HIS CONFIDENTIAL REPRIMAND FROM THE VILLA HILLS ETHICS BOARD FOR MISUSE OF CITY PERSONNEL AND RESOURCES, HIS HIRING OF HIS PERSONAL ATTORNEY TO SERVE AS THE TAXPAYER-FUNDED CITY ATTORNEY, HIS $23,000-PLUS TAXPAYER-FUNDED "BONUS CHECK", THE FINDING BY FOUR RESPECTED JUDGES THAT MARTIN DID INDEED COMMIT FORGERY, THE FACT THAT MARTIN HAS BEEN OPERATING AN UNLICENSED HANDYMAN BUSINESS IN VILLA HILLS and much, much more.

Of course Martin's goon squad is happy to help the miniature mullah devise such a devious communications plan. Why? Because their noses are deeply ensconced in the taxpayer trough.

We also know for a fact that Martin is already lining up the remaining members of his hillbilly lynchmob to take to social networks FALSELY proclaiming what a mess he inherited and climb podiums to announce that he does "great things for people". It will be fun to read and hear all of those LIES and parse their DISHONEST words.

We also know for a fact that Martin is worriedly whipping up the civic club ass clowns that inexplicably remain loyal to him. He hopes these simple-minded ass clowns tell their friends and neighbors what a great mayor Martin has been. Why? Because even the dim-witted Martin realizes that most voters do only about ten seconds of planning before casting votes in local elections. Remember, the mendacious Martin only needs one more vote than his opponent or opponents on November 4, 2014 to be re-elected.

We also know for a fact that Martin already has his remaining lackeys compiling PHONY dirt on potential opponents. The tiny tyrant believes that since all of the LIES he told about his 2010 opponent worked, that those LIES will surely work again in 2014. Anyone thinking about running for mayor in Villa Hills in 2014 had better be prepared for the s#!tstorm that Martin is calumniously cooking up for them. They also better be prepared to react to them immediately. What the heck, we can't do everything. As hard as we are gearing up to do so.

The next big date and time will be Tuesday, August 12 at 4PM. That is the filing deadline for the Villa Hills election. We are hearing numerous rumors of several people who are currently considering a run for the mayor's office. It is there for the taking, if the right candidate is ready to withstand that aforementioned s#!tstorm that Martin is already preparing for them.

That is. of course, assuming that ten of those people don't throw their hat into the ring. If that happens, Martin would have a chance to win with just 11% of the vote!

That is the subject of a story we are developing now.



Martin