The Martin Chronicles best investigative reporter was having lunch at a local Crescent Springs eatery and overheard a conversation between two long-time locals who were trying to decide just how crooked Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin really is. Following is the best recollection that our reporter could provide.
"Is Martin more crooked than the crooked man who walked a crooked mile?"
"No doubt about it."
"Is Martin more crooked than Mona Lisa's smile?"
"Oh, sure he is."
"Is Martin more crooked than a picture on the wall after an earthquake that measures more than 7 on the Richter scale?"
"Of course."
"Is Martin more crooked than San Francisco's Lombard Street? I've been there. That is one crooked road."
"Sure he is. Martin is an even more crooked little sonuvabitch."
"Is Martin more crooked than the famous 'crooked trees' in Saskatchewan, Canada?"
"C'mon. That's way too easy. Given everything that lying little bastard has done, he's far more crooked than those Canadian trees."
"Is Martin more crooked than that Marcus Allen 74-yard touchdown run against the Washington Redskins in the 1984 Super Bowl?"
"Martin's constantly crooked 'stuff' makes Allen look like an amateur."
"But there is no way Martin is more crooked that President Richard Nixon was when Nixon told folks that the people needed to know he was 'not a crook' and the resigned because he was a crook, right?"
"Seriously? Martin makes Nixon look like a piker. At least Nixon had the decency to get his crooked ass out of the White House when the jig was up. Hell, that crooked little bastard Martin is telling everyone that he's running for re-election."
The voters will make their decision about that " crooked little bastard Martin" in 124 days.
