What Is Martin's "Threshold"?

The Martin Chronicles is watching the calendar fly by. Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin stands for re-election in less than 119 days. It will be here before you know it. But the rapidly growing number of people who have been appalled and embarrassed by Martin's abject mismanagement and rampant corruption better not start popping champagne corks just yet.

If the election is a one-on-one affair between currently-filed candidate Ernie Brown and the miscreant Martin, the tiny tyrant stands a fair-and well-deserved-chance of being sent to the dust bin of history. This despite the fact that Martin will certainly run another below-the-belt, dirtbag campaign and some number of Civic Club directors have also already announced that they intend to launch a slime campaign against Brown. If Brown keeps his head and runs the correct kind of campaign, he should survive Martin's and the Civic Club directors' dishonesty.

But a three-way or more mayoral campaign muddies the water and increases Martin's chances of winning on November 4. Former Covington Mayor Irvin Callery has said that he intends to file to run for mayor. For those who see the damage Martin is doing, that is not good news.

We are also hearing that some unnamed attorney and some unnamed person with experience in the public sector are seriously considering a run for the mayor's office. For those who see the damage that Martin is doing, that is even worse news.

Why do we write that? Because even a failure like Martin has some base of support. If five people run for mayor, Martin could theoretically be re-elected with just twenty-one percent of the vote.

No, we don't think Callery is serving as a "Trojan Horse" for Martin. This despite the fact that Martin has already hired a former Covington police officer to replace Dan Goodenough and the diminutive dictator's two most loyal apparatchiks-Toad V. McMurtry and Craigory Bohman-have very, very close ties to Covington.

At least we don't think so.

WEEKENDER: A Fair Question

The Martin Chronicles publisher was approached by a well-known Villa Hills resident earlier today who had a cogent comment and a fair question. The savvy citizen got right to the point.

"Martin is a psycho. The guy obviously lives in a crazy reality all his own. Let me ask you this. Dan Goodenough had no problem working with the four mayors prior to that loon Martin, right? So, isn't it obvious that the problem wasn't Goodenough? The obvious problem is that Martin is a whacked-out wingnut, right?"

Yep. We certainly agree.

Will a majority of Villa Hills voters agree in 120 days?

Independence Day

The Martin Chronicles' entire staff wishes everyone a safe and happy July 4th Holiday. Our beloved publisher is throwing us a party-including a massive fireworks show-at a remote, undisclosed location.

We also extend our sympathies to the embattled residents of malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's strife-torn Villa Hills. Things are a real mess. But there is some hope.

The voters of Villa Hills can declare their independence from Martin's incompetence, corruption and general nitwittery in 123 days.

There IS A Crooked Man

The Martin Chronicles best investigative reporter was having lunch at a local Crescent Springs eatery and overheard a conversation between two long-time locals who were trying to decide just how crooked Villa Hills malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin really is. Following is the best recollection that our reporter could provide.

"Is Martin more crooked than the crooked man who walked a crooked mile?"

"No doubt about it."

"Is Martin more crooked than Mona Lisa's smile?"

"Oh, sure he is."

"Is Martin more crooked than a picture on the wall after an earthquake that measures more than 7 on the Richter scale?"

"Of course."

"Is Martin more crooked than San Francisco's Lombard Street? I've been there. That is one crooked road."

"Sure he is. Martin is an even more crooked little sonuvabitch."

"Is Martin more crooked than the famous 'crooked trees' in Saskatchewan, Canada?"

"C'mon. That's way too easy. Given everything that lying little bastard has done, he's far more crooked than those Canadian trees."

"Is Martin more crooked than that Marcus Allen 74-yard touchdown run against the Washington Redskins in the 1984 Super Bowl?"

"Martin's constantly crooked 'stuff' makes Allen look like an amateur."

"But there is no way Martin is more crooked that President Richard Nixon was when Nixon told folks that the people needed to know he was 'not a crook' and the resigned because he was a crook, right?"

"Seriously? Martin makes Nixon look like a piker. At least Nixon had the decency to get his crooked ass out of the White House when the jig was up. Hell, that crooked little bastard Martin is telling everyone that he's running for re-election."

The voters will make their decision about that " crooked little bastard Martin" in 124 days.

And We Don't Have A Paddle

The Martin Chronicles best reporter sent us this photo of a new sign that has been posted in malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's vexed Villa Hills. It certainly sums up the situation in Martinville, doesn't it?

Sign Of The Times?

The Martin Chronicles reporters are fanning out over the streets of malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's troubled town of Villa Hills trying to confirm several rumors about new signs popping up. We are heading in to election season after all.

We have received unconfirmed reports that yard signs are appearing that read, "Fire Mike Martin On November 4th!" in large, bold, red letters. We'll let you know what we discover.

Martin may very well be "fired" in 125 days.

War Of The Words

The Martin Chronicles considers the give-and-take on various social networks a great barometer for what's happening in malfeasant Mayor Mike Martin's Villa Hills. A recent stream of posts on the Voice of Villa Hills Facebook page is a fine example. We also suspect it indicates we're heading towards yet another nasty election in Martinville.

First, people should remember that when someone loses an election they are not required to surrender their First Amendment rights as well. Former elected officials should feel as free to post their thoughts as anybody else. Their views are just as legitimate as everyone else's. To suggest otherwise is "vile and disgusting".  

Secondly, its becoming clear that the Voice of Villa Hills is coming under attack simply for political reasons. The misdirecting Martin is claiming that the Voice "is out of business". A Martin sycophant is suggesting that the Facebook page has been "hijacked". Again, "vile and disgusting".

Given the type of below-the-belt, dishonest, dirtbag campaign Martin always runs, we look for some hard feelings to begin boiling over. It may be fun to cover. But its not good for the City.

And either is Martin.